How to get Tinder hookups
a powerful 4-Step process for tinder hookups
I’m a M33 living in Stockholm and I’ll reveal my go-to process for finding FWB:s and casual hookups on Tinder.
Women want to be seduced and deserve to have a good time, here’s how you do it:
Key Takeaways
01: Learn how to highlight attractive traits through your photos to gain quality and hookup-friendly matches.
02: Create a hookup friendly profile using the C.V.H system
03: Use the S.E.M.C system to turn your tinder match into a first date
04: Seduce through the different phases explained below, such as the emotional rollercoaster
Maintain a lighthearted approach throughout, this makes your intentions clear. Always Respect boundaries and consent.
01. fully understand attraction on tinder
Having written a book on how to increase your natural level of attraction, and how attraction works both IRL and on dating apps, I have a few things to say on the topic:
If a resumé is meant to highlight skills, then a dating profile is all about highlighting your attractive traits.
Demonstrating attractive traits is key
One of women’s deepest biological needs is to feel secure.
And when women are around people they like and feel safe with, the “love hormone” oxytocin is released.
This happens to a greater extend if the man successfully demonstrates one or a few of the so-called attractive traits, examples are:
Confident
Bold
Intelligent
Serene
Graceful
Leader qualities
Self-Distance
Informed
Fun
Socially skilled
To absolutely crush it on dating apps as a guy you want to learn how to visually communicate and highlight your attractive traits, but also try to eliminate negative non-attractive ones. This will massively increase matches which is the first step to find your next tinder hookup.
How do i figure out and demonstrate my attractive traits?
While a lot of these actually sit in your facial expressions (not features), others sit in the overall vibe of the photo.
A profile with a lot of selfies for example, does the opposite of demonstrating social proof. A selfie-heavy profile signals that you don’t have a social circle and selfies should therefore be avoided.
For your facial expressions, you can actually use apps such as Faceapp to do minor tweaks to make yourself look more confident and passionate, and possibly bring out that smile a little. I wouldn’t call that catfishing, girls use makeup.
Your sexiest authentic self
This is not about trying to show off or not being authentic. “Showing off” actually is considered a weakness because a person that is truly confident doesn’t have to show off.
This is why shirtless pics don’t work for instance.
02. Craft a Tinder profile for hookups
Tinder users looking for a hook up make up a significant portion of the app’s user base. Demonstrating a set of attractive traits successfully, through the use of visual communication and good presentation skills [learn how I do it], is what you need to do for your photos.
Use 4-6 photos, with attractive traits highlighted
Max 1 selfie (preferably none)
No shirtless images
At least 1 hero shot (upper body + face)
Try to have photos where you were “caught in the act” of doing something, instead of posing.
Use Lightroom to subtle edit your photos to make them more presentable
Use Faceapp to make your facial expressions more confident/passionate
tinder BIOs for hookups
The bio should be short and sweet. One sentence could be enough. Not feeling creative? Leverage the C.V.H. system.
C for Contrast: If your photos are weighted too much in any way, make sure to add something to contrast this in your bio. Looking self-absorbed in a few of your photos? Add something self-distant/grounding/humbling.
V for Value: Since it’s all about adding attractive value on these apps, the bio is a place to do this as well. Skills and passions are attractive. Love to cook? Or do any type of work with your hands, write that out in a fun way.
H for Humour: Possibly the most essential for Tinder hookups. The bio needs to be lighthearted and not serious. You can write the C or the V in a fun way, but you could also have a bio that’s just fun and lighthearted without adding any value or contrast to your profile.
A well-crafted Tinder bio is essential for making a strong impression and attracting the right matches.
03. Messaging strategies for Tinder hookups
Use the S.E.M.C system described in detail in Effortless Attraction, with example convos:
S - Stimulate: Go through her profile to find her “emotional element”, what is it that takes up space in her mind? You want to push that button to spark intrigue. Most women do not want to be seduced with sex right from the start. You need to build slow.
E - Engage: Time your messages when you think she’s the most likely to be able to engage. Maybe it’s on Sundays, people generally spend more time on their phone then. People go on dating apps in a passive state, and even the girls looking for hookups won’t be horny every time they open the app.
M - Momentum: Ideally, you want the convo to enter a “live chat” feel. Convos that stretch over days responding back and forth have a high risk of not turning into a date. Keep the convo casual and lighthearted and focus on building an emotional connection**(essential for attraction for the 10s of women).**
C - Close: Even though I’ve had girls come over to my place to have sex straight from the convo, most girls wouldn’t do this because of trust issues. When the convo is peaking, ask her out for a date. Be specific and get her details, number is preferred. Transitioning from Tinder conversation to real-life meetings is crucial for successful hookups.
04. In-person seduction
Once you’ve closed the date with the S.E.M.C system it’s time to physically seduce.
Getting drinks is the best date for hookups, since people relax and become more sexual when they are tipsy.
I have written an entire book on seduction, but what it’s all about is making her feel secure. Be calm and liberating, make your presence feel natural. I usually do some metta mediation the days leading up to the date to be in a zen mode.
emotional rollercoaster
Seduction is all about a balance of security and tension.
If there is chemistry between you, you are enjoying each others company, then it’s time to enter the emotional rollercoaster. This is where a mix of tension/security is introduced.
There needs to be a bit of playful teasing in order for seduction to take place. I sometimes start talking about her character traits, possibly by entering the topic of zodiac signs, and I might make her feel slightly insecure, but in a playful and safe way.
Move closer & introduce physical touch
If we are sitting opposite of each other, I usually ask her to come sit next to me. Your legs are touching naturally and it’s time to introduce physical touch. Play with or hold her hand, to eventually escalate into a kiss on the neck, if she seems to welcome you being physical.
Take a cab & stay light-hearted & physical
Finish up your drinks and go to whoever lives nearby. Make out in the backseat or as soon as you get home. Have sex. Keep a lighthearted approach throughout the whole night, this makes your intentions clearer. If you suspect she want to date seriously, you’ll have to tell her what you are looking for. Most of the time this isn’t necessary.
Safety and Etiquette for Tinder Hookups
When it comes to casual sex on Tinder, prioritizing safety and etiquette is essential.
Always arrange to meet in a public place and inform a friend or family member about your plans, including who you’ll be with and where you’ll be.
Respect your match’s boundaries and consent, and never pressure them into doing something they’re not comfortable with.
Using protection is a must to ensure both parties are safe. By following these guidelines, you can enjoy casual hookups on Tinder while maintaining a respectful and safe environment for both you and your matches.
Bonus tips
There’s a well-tested Tinder hookup strategy for you. If you’ve been in a relationship with a girl that loves sexting, and this is something you are comfortable doing. You can absolutely do that in the Tinder chat, but it is risky, because you don’t know if that is her style.
If done right however, you can bypass the date and go straight for the hookup, but if done wrong you could end up being banned (after a few failed attempts).
Want to see examples of successful sexting? And how I was able to make a girl come home to me while I was in the bath tub? To have her take off her clothes and join me (never having met before) then read Effortless Attraction.
